Family dynamics during the best of times can be complicated and stressful. Now, many women are struggling to cope with anxiety caused by family members who don’t want to practice social distancing or ignores COVID-19 guidelines. Having awkward and potentially stressful conversations about your COVID-related boundaries with your extended family may be filling you with dread. Especially now that the holidays are quickly approaching. Maybe, you’re worried that your family may get their feelings hurt or be angry when you share your plan for social distancing. Or, perhaps you’re concerned they may even try and convenience you that you’re being irrational. But, your primary goal right now is keeping your family safe and healthy. 

Your family loves you and they want to see you and your family during the holidays. You get it. You’re sick and tired of COVID-19 messing with the normal activities you used to enjoy. But, you believe in social distancing and following the CDC’s guidelines. After all, it’s for everyone’s own good, right?! What if you were somehow exposed when grocery shopping, and before showing symptoms, exposed an elderly family member. That would make you feel horrible. Or, maybe you have a child who is immunocompromised and simply can’t risk their health. So... what are you supposed to do? You know that no matter how challenging these conversations are, you have to have them, and soon. 

I get it. As a woman, wife, and (new) Mom, I am in the same boat. I have COVID fatigue too and am disappointed at all the things COVID is taking away from us. But, I am relieved to tell you that, there are ways to manage your anxiety about these conversations and assert your boundaries in a confident and respectful way. 

Here are my suggestions, as an online therapist, for talking to family who does not want to social distance.

Write out your family’s holiday plans and COVID-19 boundaries

This may seem silly, but often the simple act of writing it down, helps it seem more official. Talk to your spouse and get their input too. But, writing down your plan and having it in front of you will help you feel confident in your plan. This confidence will go a long way when you talk to your family. You’re more likely to experience anxiety or pressure if you don’t seem certain about your plans when you talk to other people. 

Acknowledge how hard social distancing is emotionally on you and your family members

Social distancing and not being able to be together as a family hurts. It’s not easy for anyone. But, you’ve decided it’s necessary. So, share your disappointment with your loved ones. And, acknowledge their sadness too. 

Offer other ways to participate in family events

Maybe you get together outdoors or mask at larger gatherings? Or, you offer a time to spend connect via Zoom to participate in a family tradition together. Rather in person, and following guidelines, or virtual, you can still connect and bond with your family. Perhaps, you’ll even come up with new family traditions. 

Offer yourself grace and compassion

No matter how much you try, you can’t please everyone. You also cannot control their feelings and emotions. When you feel frustrated, exhausted, or sad, remind yourself that these feelings are justified and normal. Practice some self-care and communicate with your spouse how you’re feeling. Ultimately, remind yourself that you’re doing what you’re comfortable with and what you feel is best for your immediate family. 

Struggling to cope with your anxiety during this challenging time?

If you’re having a hard time coping with all the stress of COVID-19, family dynamics, and life in general, I encourage you to consider online therapy. I offer online therapy for women with anxiety in Colorado, Louisiana, and Hawaii. In addition to treating anxiety, I specialize in treating depression, providing postpartum anxiety and depression treatment, counseling for overwhelmed moms, trauma treatment, therapy for military spouses, and more. I would love to speak with you about the many benefits of online therapy and how it can help you take care of your mental health and get back to living the life you love. 

Begin Online Therapy in Louisiana, Hawaii, and Colorado:

I know life can feel stressful right now, but please know that it’s okay to reach out for support and help! Online therapy in Hawaii, online therapy in Colorado, and online therapy in Louisiana for women with anxiety! To begin online therapy, please follow these steps:

1. Schedule your free, 15-minute consultation via phone or video call

2. Learn more about the ways I can help you in therapy

3. Begin the journey to being the mother you always wanted to be!

Online Mental Health Services Offered By Ashley Comegys, LCSW

I offer a variety of online mental health services to residents of Louisiana, Colorado, and Hawaii. These include individual counseling for women, anxiety counseling, depression treatment, counseling for mothers, postpartum anxiety and depression treatment, postpartum support, counseling for military spouses, and counseling for women who have survived trauma.

*Please note, as a licensed social worker, I am only able to see clients who are physically located in Hawaii, Louisiana, and Colorado.